It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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