Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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