I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Randomize
