The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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