I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
