I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
