seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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