I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
