Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
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