escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
