We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
