Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
