How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
