we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
