I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
