Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Randomize
