Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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