Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
