so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Randomize
