I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
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