I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
