i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Randomize
