have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Randomize
