i was rollin on her like bob the builder
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
