Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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