BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
A bitchslap is in order.
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