It was confusing and full of hummus
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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