Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
