I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
