you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
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