dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
