East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
