i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
