he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
