I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
