i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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