So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
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