Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
