Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize
