I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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