It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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