hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
You pole danced in your parka.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Oh god it's open bar.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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