I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
