i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
