i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
honey bunches of taint.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
