id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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