Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize