JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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