Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Randomize
