Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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