I'm really into asian looking animals
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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